Bits & Pieces

I've been meaning to update here for awhile, but life has just gotten in the way. So this post is going to be a quick bullet point update, just to get me caught me up. Although if one were placing bets, I'll probably fall behind again.

• Jack turned 2 just over a week ago. I can't believe it! I feel it every day with the girls, but this birthday really pointed out to me how quickly the time is going. He's doing well, into everything, finally starting to talk and the most lovable guy ever. An interesting note on the speech - I was starting to get worried that he was possibly behind because he didn't seem to have near the vocabulary the girls did (I know, never compare children). And he's extremely stubborn. For example, he can say Einstein, but refuses to say milk. But at his doctor's appt. we were told he's actually slightly above average, so I'm very relieved.

• I had my titers tested 2 weeks ago and those luckily came back at 1:1. I tested again today and am praying for the same results. I'll find out for sure on Wednesday. This was supposed to be the pregnancy I really enjoyed, didn't wish to rush past, etc, since it's our last. And yet, here I am worrying all the time. It's really hard living two weeks at a time. But I am getting close to the end and I'll can hope for is a healthy baby in the end.

• The girls have been so busy, it's crazy. Samantha finished up the cheer season in November at regional competition. They had done really well at local and had they done exceptionally well at regionals, they would have been invited to nationals in Disneyland in March. I am a horrible mom and relieved to say, while they did awesome, they did not place high enough to qualify! There was a part of me that hoped the crazy schedule would talk Sam into NOT doing it next year, but it has instead talked BOTH girls into doing it. Samantha also just completed her first year in the Nutcracker (ballet) this past weekend. She did amazing, but we're all exhausted. And now, both girls have signed up to the school musical.

So that's really all for now. We're all looking forward to Christmas break, which starts Friday and the little bit of down time it will provide us.

The Great Unknown

We have recently learned that this is now considered a high risk pregnancy, although at this moment we don't know to what extent.

Last Thursday I got a phone call from my doctor saying that my blood work came back positive for the anti-c antibody. I have not had this in previous pregnancies and while her original thoughts were it happened during my delivery with Jack, it's looking more like it's happened within this pregnancy, since it was negative at my 10 week blood work up. Basically, I must have had a silent bleed at some point in this pregnancy and the baby and I have shared blood, changing the make up of my blood and my body is now attacking the baby's red blood cells. While I understand much more than I did last week, I still don't completely understand the genetics of all of it. What this could result in is severe jaundice in the baby either before and/or after birth.

Last week my titer levels (what they judge this by) came back at 1:1, which is very good news. I retested again this past Monday and my levels remained at 1:1, which is great news. It means the levels are very low and that my body has not yet started viewing the baby as "foreign". If it starts to rise, it means my body is going on "attack" mode. I will retest again every two weeks until the end of the pregnancy and we will base the next course of treatment on those results.

The outcome for this can vary. Worse case scenario, which we are not allowing ourselves to go to, would be stillbirth. Best case scenario is that my titer levels remain low and I go on to have an semi-uneventful remainder of the pregnancy and normal delivery. Other possible scenarios include a preterm delivery and possible NICU stay, interutarine blood transfusions and/or blood transfusions after birth for the baby, and mild to severe jaundice (which in it's own right could require a NICU stay regardless of being term or not). Long term (after the newborn period) there should be no risk to the baby. Long term for me - if I were to ever need a blood transfusion in the future, I would need to make sure they gave me some that has this anti-c antibody or my body will reject it. It may make sense for me to bank my own blood when I'm not pregnant, but we'll cross that at a later date.

Although my titer levels could raise at anytime, it is to my benefit that they are so low and that it happened so late in the pregnancy. Titer levels raise in doubles, so 1:1, 1:2, 1:4, etc, although could jump mulitple levels. As long as my levels remain under 1:8, we can continue on as though this was a normal pregnancy, minus the extra blood work. If it raises beyond that, we will go to the next step which are specialized ultrasounds that would check the baby for anemia. It's only if those results are too high, that we would start discussing the interuterarine blood transfusions. The belief is if my levels remain as low as they are now, that the baby should not have any complications (in regards to this) at birth, although we won't know that for sure until he/she is born. For right now, I am able to stay with my doctor, who is consulting with a high risk doctor. If things get worse, I will be referred to a perinatoligist at a larger hospital.

So for now, we sit and wait. I'll admit it's weird to be "high risk" and yet have nothing I can do change the outcome of this. My next test results will be in 2 weeks. When we got this news we were devasted as I'm sure you can imagine, but now we are cautiously optomistic about it. Right now, we could really use your good thoughts and prayers that my titer levels stay low and that this remains an uneventful pregnancy with a normal delivery.

Happy Birthday Alexandra!

Today my baby girl turns 5! It is hard to believe that at this exact moment, 5 years ago, I was sitting in a hospital minutes away from giving birth to this beautiful little girl. Lexi came into this world 10 days early, with a head full of black hair, weighing 7lbs 14oz and was 21 in. long.

Since that day, she has been a constant bright light in our lives. Sure, she can be the most frustrating child at times. Her ability is listen depends on her mood and we often tease her that she's must be visiting "Lexi's world" because she isn't here with us. When I first suggested that to her, expecting her to get mad at me like her big sister would, she looked at me dead pan and said "it is really cool here, there is 102 roller coasters!". That's our girl :)

But she is also the most caring, compassionate, loving child I have ever met. She truly cares about others, is always willing to share her time and her things and is never one to back away from a hug or a kiss from us. Her laugh is contagious and you can truly tell she's happy when you see the giant dimple form on her cheek.

A 5th birthday are a milestone for a child and it's no different in this case. Maybe it's because she was my baby for so long or because she already seems so grown up, but this is a hard one for me. She's already started kindergarten and thriving, she's already started living in a world that doesn't always include me and she is definitely becoming her own little person. But she is one who absolutely knows home is where your story begins.

Lexi, you are a bright, shining star in our lives. You amaze us each and every day and we are so proud to be your parents. You have a unique job of being both a younger and older sister and you excel at both. May being 5 be all that you want it to be. We love you with everything we are.

We had our big ultrasound yesterday. Although not so "big" for us as we chose again to stay yellow team. What I can tell you is that the baby looks good, is average size (after Jack, yay!) with really long legs and is very active!



It only seems appropriate that before my appointment I watched a show on Discovery Health called "8 Boys and Wanting a Girl." It was all about families who have boys (some with 4, one with as many as 8), who truly believe their lives will incomplete without a girl.

This is something I've never truly understood - the desire for one gender over another. And some might say that I feel that because I have both, but that isn't true. I was shocked when I had Jack and found out I had a boy. I really believed we were having another girl and was excited about it. Nacho and I have never gone into this "trying" for anything. We didn't plan a 3rd baby in hopes of "finally getting our boy" (which quite frankly is a phrase I'm so tired of hearing), nor did we ever feel we were done because we had one. We have more kids because we want more kids. I love my children for who they are, not what they are.

So, some of these women were willing to try just about anything, including gender selection, while others couldn't afford anything but the hope & pray method. Of the four women, one who did extreme measures, did get twin girls. But she is the one that bothered me the most. She likened not having a girl (keep in mind she had 4 beautiful boys)to not being able to have kids at all. Now, I've never been infertile, so I won't pretend to speak for them, but I can't imagine there is anything that compares to the heartbreak of not being able to have any children if you really want them. She also refused to marry her partner unless he could give her girls. Because she finally got them, she finally agreed to marry him - 17 years and 6 kids later. Something seems wrong with that picture.

Only one of the other women were able to get pregnant again and when she was getting her big ultrasound done, she burst into tears when she found out it was another boy. She came home depressed, like having a healthy baby wasn't good enough. Now like I've said, I don't understand the feeling of need for either gender, which is probably why it's so easy for us to stay yellow team. I guess I can sort of understand the desire to have one of each or hoping for one first. But to let it make you feel like your life isn't complete, especially when you've got beautiful children at home - that I don't understand. And it makes me wonder - do these children suffer because they aren't who their mothers wanted. Do they live with knowing that every day?

For us, boy or girl, we are just thrilled to be adding another member to Team Lua. Either one will complete this family.

Lesson: Slow Down

Background: Samantha is now a cheerleader, which I'll get to in a later post because it really does feel like it's taken over our lives.

Last night, I dropped Sam off at cheer practice and because I had a few minutes to kill before a meeting I had to be at, I decided to stay and watch for a bit. They take attendance and the girls run their lap(s). As a bunch of girls were running the far outside of the blacktop, opposite of where we were, a pick up truck comes barreling through, almost taking out quite a few of our cheerleaders. I watch in horror as this truck comes close to hitting Sam and knowing there is no way for me to get over there in time. By the grace of God, Sam realizes something's up and goes the only other direction she can to avoid getting hit - face first into a basketball pole.

As she comes limping back to me, I go out to meet her. The force has knocked the wind out of her, which has terrified her and she's got a nice bruise forming above her eyebrow. The cheer directer meets me and calls over on her cell to where this guy is going, only to be told that he was trying to get to a hurt football player. Umm, excuse me? So taking out a bunch of cheerleaders to get to an injured football player is somehow ok? The cheer director deals with that, while her coach gets her some ice, but at this point, she's had enough and wants to go home. And who could blame her.

This guy, which I found out later is the grandfather of the hurt player, never once used his horn to warn them he was coming up behind them, nor did he ever come over to see if Sam was ok. I think this is a case where I can truly call someone an asshole and mean it. Because he either didn't see the cheerleaders (next to impossible with 50 of them out there) or he simply didn't care. And I know this because moments later as I was carrying Sam back across the blacktop, he came barreling back through again...while there were still cheerleaders out there.

There is a part of me that wishes I had confronted the guy, but holding my baby was more important at that moment. Not to mention, he was in a truck and he apparently wasn't afraid to use it. I don't know where it will go from here. The football board has said they'll talk to the parents, but I'm not sure how much that will change anything, unless they make a policy that nobody, other than emergency vehicles, can come onto the black top during practices. But something needs to be done because it was only 3 weeks ago when some other asshole decided he didn't want to let a group of 10 of us finish crossing (in a crosswalk!) the parking lot after practice, so he gunned it and swerved around us, barely missing some of the cheerleaders.

So while Sam has a major headache and a nice size bruise & goose egg, she is no worse for wear. And compared to the alternative of what could have happened last night, for that I am thankful.

The lesson: slow down. The 20 seconds you saved, could have taken the life of somebody else.

Updated 9/16 to add: They have closed practices to all vehicles (they are keeping the fire gate locked to all but emergency vehicles) and they have sent out an email to every single parent. I am so glad they are taking this seriously!

Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning?

There are very few songs that can move me to tears anytime I hear them. One of those songs is "Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning?" by Alan Jackson. Every time it plays, I stop what I'm doing and remember where I was on that horrible day. Today, it has been 9 years.



So, where were you when the world stopped turning?

I was in bed with my husband, when our tv came on and we both sat straight up and watched in horror as the 2nd plane struck the World Trade Center. It felt like we were watching a movie - surely this couldn't be real. As we prayed for all those people, it suddenly struck me - my mom and stepdad were flying home from Greece that very morning. I called my dad in a panic and then we sat in silence on the phone as a plane hit the Pentagon. It was at that time we decided it would be better to be together, so we drove down to his house. We sat glued to the tv all day. I'm sure we got up occasionally and we must have eaten, but I don't remember any of it. I do remember endless phone calls to the airlines, trying to get information about my mom, that never connected. I did feel better once they had grounded all flights, and I knew realistically those weren't her flights, as her only connection was in Heathrow, but the not knowing was like a sucker punch. Finally, early the next morning, I received a phone call from her - they were safe in Scotland, where they would spend the next week before being allowed to fly home.

As I listen to my 3 children running around and laughing and I feel my 4th, happily moving inside me, I am deeply humbled and grateful for all that has been sacrificed so I can sit here with my family.

To all the military personal, fire fighters, police officers, flight crews and everyday civilians who gave so much that day - THANK YOU!

ALL GAVE SOME. SOME GAVE ALL. WE WILL NOT FORGET.

Team Lua is Growing!

That's right! We are thrilled to announce that Team Lua is growing by one more, due to make his/her appearance around Valentine's Day! We are all very excited (except for Jack who doesn't realize what's going on).

So to answer some questions - yes, we know how this happens. Yes, this baby was planned, as were all of ours. While I know to never say never, I do feel I can say with certainty, this will be our last baby. We will not be finding out the gender until delivery (and no we don't do this to torture other people). And yes, we know we'll have our hands full, but we already do. And we're loving every minute (well almost every minute) of it!