Rambling Thoughts

The last 6 months have been a medical nightmare for my family. Some may remember that back in October, one of my grandmothers (my mom's mom) was rushed to the ER because she was unresponsive. Well it turns out she was suffering from congestive heart failure. There were some other problems as well, but after awhile things were looking up. Then in December another grandmother (my mom's stepmom)was rushed to the ER and it was determined she was also suffering from congestive heart failure (or that was last I was told). Luckily, things started looking good for her and she was back in her own apartment the day before Christmas and we were all able to celebrate together. Overall the beginning of the year was quiet until a few weeks ago when my grandfather (my mom's stepdad) was diagnosed with leukemia. The poor guy was so busy taking care of my grandmother, he seemed to ignore the fact that he was feeling miserable himself. And even though my mom has many siblings, she seems to take on most of the work herself. Some is by choice, some by circumstance, but most of the load none the less. She doesn't complain about it - she just does it. Nacho and I pick up the slack where we can, like driving people to and from the hospital, waiting in the ER, making phone calls, making sure the sick's significant other eats, things like that. All of a sudden we're heros in my grandparents eyes and I don't really get that. I feel like we're doing what anybody would do. But maybe not? We couldn't imagine being anywhere else if there is any possible way we can help. It makes me sad that not everybody thinks the same way.

So this year Nacho and I decided we were going to do something a little more special for my mom's birthday (which was last Friday). I don't know if anybody else feels it, nor has she ever mentioned it, but we dropped the ball for her 50th birthday. Like dropped it and let it roll down the hill bad. But this year of all years she deserved it. So we took her to the Melting Pot, a place she's wanted to go but I knew she'd never take herself. And it was so much fun. The girls loved it, Jack was an angel and it was the first time in while I've felt like she's actually been able to relax. We didn't know it then, but boy did she need it. Because the next morning, she got a call from my granmother that my grandfather (the one with leukemia) had fallen and had a stroke and was on his way to the ER. My grandmother can't drive herself, so my mom called us to help get her. We sat in the ER for most of the day without any real answers, except that he seemed to be stable (thank goodness). Nacho took the kids home for awhile while my mom and I waited with my grandmother. I think he finally got admitted into a room at 11pm that night. We also spent most of yesterday at the hospital visiting him and it looks like things are getting better (although he's obviously still fighting leukemia).

Which brings me to my next thought - I have an awesome husband. He can drive me crazy (like I'm sure I do to him), but he is one of the most patient and understanding people I've met. He came to the hospital when we needed him, he took the kids home and let me stay when we all needed that. He did all the driving back and forth. He never complained about having to do bedtime by himself (since I got home late both Sat & Sun). He even fixed my car yesterday. He was there for my mom when she needed somebody and he was there for my grandmother who needed all the people she could get. I don't know, maybe all husbands are like this. I just know that mine has stepped up more times than I can count and I am forever grateful.

I also realize how truly lucky I am to have my grandparents in my life still and so close, both in distance and in heart. And how lucky my family is that my children are getting to know their great-grandparents and make memories they truly remember. I realize most people don't get this opportunity.

So here I am today. Back to the daily grind. The girls are at school, the baby is napping - my house looks like a tornado hit it and I don't really care. Because the last few month have taught me how quickly things can change. How much we all take for granted. Yesterday I was able to joke with my grandmother like we have for years (for those who know her, you know her kind of jokes!) and it was so refreshing. Because not so many months ago, she wasn't able to complete a sentence and I wasn't sure I'd ever see her like this again. So I'm going to try to call people more often just to say hi. I'm going to stop talking about having lunch with my other grandmother (my dad's mom) and actually do it. I'm going to stop rushing through each day and actually enjoy it. Well, I'm going to try to do all these things - I do still have 3 children after all!