Time Keeps Going

There are those things in life that sometimes feel like they just happened yesterday, even though it's been years. Things that make you realize how fast time is going by. Most are happy things, like my kids getting older or vacations we've taken. But some are horrible things. Unexpected things. And yet time keeps going.

My uncle passed away 6 years ago yesterday. And that number is something I should know, since he died right after I had Samantha and she is now 6. Yet, it seems impossible it's been 6 years. Wasn't he just right here, over the moon that we were expecting our first baby? Wasn't it just yesterday we were having Survivor nights at their house? In reality, I know it's not - that little one we were expecting is now 6 and she has two younger siblings. Survivor is in it's something like 20th season. But those memories are fresh....and maybe that's a good thing.

Maybe one of the reasons it's so hard to believe that so much time has gone by is that his passing was so unexpected. He was having a problem with his eye, he thought he might have the flu and then the bomb was dropped. Exactly two weeks after I gave birth to Samantha, I was back at the hospital because my uncle had been admitted with a broken ankle....and cancer. The fastest spreading cancer they had seen. Not even 2 days after being admitted, the cancer had spread to his entire body. He passed away that following Monday. Not even 5 days from diagnosis to death.

He never did get to meet that little baby he was so excited about. Nor the two we had after her. And oh, how I wish he had. They all would have loved eachother. I suppose I have to take solice in that my kids have some pretty kick-ass guardian angels looking over them. But I'd honestly rather them be here knowing my kids.

I don't neccessarily believe that time heals all wounds. I think there are some wounds that just can't be healed. Sure, life goes on, but because it has to. We are approaching the 12th anniversary of one grandfather's death and the 1st anniversary of another. And even though there have been a million memories in between, I still miss them both the same. So 1 year, 6 years, 12 years; expected or unexpected deaths - they should ALL still be here.

Uncle Marty, know that you are thought of often, missed daily and loved always.

Martin Eric Nelson
March 19, 1946 - March 29, 2004